We have all seen images on the internet and thought that our house was not that tidy, and why children do not behave so well. We strive to achieve perfection since we believe that children require it to be successful.
However, the thing is that the desire to become perfect damages our relationship. Children do not require parents who do not make mistakes. They require parents who are present and who can say, “I am sorry, let us make another attempt.”
Why the Myth of the Perfect Parent is Shafting Us
As long as we pursue perfection, we are always stressed. Our bodies remain sensitive to the next mishap or tantrum to spoil our plans.
- Utopia drives individuals away: When you say that you cannot fail, a child will assume that he or she cannot fail.
- Perfection causes burnout: It is an impossible goal that makes you fatigued and angry.
3 Changes to Move From Perfection to Love
1. Connect More Than Correct
Whenever your child spills juice or forgets homework, stop. Don’t lecture right away. Show empathy and connect. Try saying: “I notice that you are getting it tough. Let’s clean this up together.”
2. Practice “The Repair”
Being a kind parent does not imply that you never get angry; rather, it means you come back and apologies. That demonstrates to the child that love is able to restore the connection after angry times.
3. Pay Attention to Your “Internal Weather”
At Loving Parents, we believe that many need perfection due to past traumas. Recovery and relaxation of our own nervous systems provide our children with a secure environment.
The Bottom Line: You Are Good Enough
Parenting is painful, disheveled, noisy, and erratic. Once we cease the desire to be perfect, we can love more. Tell yourself: “I am good enough.” Your kids will appreciate it.
Summing it Up: You Don’t Have to Parent Alone
It requires time to switch the desire for perfection to the act of love. It is the abandonment of old ways in favor of good treatment towards both you and your child.
At Loving Parents, we believe that all parents should have a community that assists in healing, resilience, and actual support. Whether you have a trauma to discuss, seek emotional tools, or simply want to understand that you are not alone, we are there.
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