It is not very easy to talk about such a heart-wrenching decision where it leaves a kid to distribute his/her time and love for the two of you individually. No kid loves to see their parents separating and living apart. But kids have the right to know the fact and adapt to this hard time in their life.
Many times, kids end up blaming themselves for your separation. so, parents must assure them that it was never their fault and you both still love them as earlier.
Positive Points that you shall Keep on Highlighting
- Your mom and dad will be happier when they live apart from each other.
- We love you the same way as we did and will be always there for you even after separation.
- You will now have two homes to live in.
- You can have your own time individually with us now.
These points will help them to feel happy about themselves and easily sink into the news without any pressure. They will not be ashamed of going to school or make friends in the society. Make sure you keep on communicating with your toddler and answer their questions positively. Always focus on the reactions your child gives when he/she is dealing with the news of your separation.
How to Break the News to your Child?
Speak to your Child Together
Choose a perfect timing and sit down to have a one-to-one conversation with your child. Tell them unitedly about your decision of separation. For a while forget all the bitterness and hate for each other, as your child needs you both. It’s about his/her emotional well-being. Besides, this will also send him/her a message that you both will always work as a team for him/her.
Be Ready for Mixed Bag of Questions
Being a new thing for the child, he/she will bombard questions which will be difficult for you to answer many times. But plan well in advance about all the questions your kid can ask and prepare your answers accordingly. Stick to one unanimous answer and don’t fight over the answers or other things in front of them. Stay calm and composed while answering all the answers!
Don’t Disclose all the Details
No, your child doesn’t need to know all the details. Always keep him/her away from the divorce papers and related stuff. Talk to your advocate or discuss with each other about the topic only when your kid is not around you.
Opt for Books
It might be surprising but yes, some books acknowledge your child about what divorce is and why is it important. Letting him/her read these books helps them easily connect with the facts about their parent’s divorce. Besides, they work on getting comfortable with this news and ease out your difficulties.