Well! As a parent, I know you are concerned about your teens. Teens are enjoying the phase of life where they are more adopted towards their freedom of privacy and own space. And you are concerned about their choices, illegal activities, disrespectful behaviors and also getting addicted to wrong habits.
It would be unfair to judge who is correct and who is not! Everyone wants to have their own space and make individual decisions where they don’t want others to interfere, whereas, on other hand, parents getting protective and worried for teens is also bound to happen and is an uncontrollable human nature.
Does your teen lock himself/herself up in a room the whole day? Or do they prefer staying outside wandering morning to evening? Scold them umpteenth of times but they’ll ignore you as if you never exist or can backfire very fiercely. This phase of life is very difficult and challenging to handle. One needs to protect their child from every evil possibility and also let them enjoy this gala time. But then a question arises how?
Practice these rituals on ‘How to let Teens have their privacy without snooping alongside also keeping your motherly/fatherly instincts alive.
1. Knock! Knock!
You will also want anyone to knock the door before entering your room, won’t you? So, practice the same when you enter their room. Teens appreciate and understand that you are not interfering in their lives and giving them space to grow and learn from life, themselves. If you sense something’s fishy, still try not to get inside without knocking. Though what you can do is, when they are not at home, go and check out what it was about. This way you can satisfy your parental anxiousness and also maintain their privacy desires.
2. Stop calling me MOM, I am fine!
Don’t you hear this every time you call? Teens get embarrassed easily. They want to maintain that ‘cool dude’ attitude in front of their friends. When you call them again and again, they get frustrated and irritated easily, also, their friends making fun of them. Just call once to check whether they are safe, and after trying to cool yourself down. What you can do is tell them to call you once, even if they are going to get late and inform you well in advance.
3. Stop interfering in their social media directly
I know, you are scared of your teen getting affected by the ill-effects of social media. Whereas also, they don’t like you snooping around their social accounts like messaging them, asking them back to back possessive questions, sending them friends request or staking their friends as well. Looking for another way around? Just do one thing, keep a check on their cell phones at night before going to bed. Though, they are not even going to like that but, it’s essential to do so. Also, make sure on serious trust breach issues you have taken measures like grounding them, not giving them pocket money, stop pampering them, etc.
4. Be well informed about their performance in schools and extra classes
Visit the school or have a conversation over the phone with the teacher-in-charge, about your teen’s performance in academics as well as other activities. The way they behave with other children in the school and their attitude towards the teachers. If you find out anything serious and disturbing, make sure you talk with your child at a suitable place and time. Don’t fire them with questions, start by asking them how they are doing in their school and what their teacher said about them. Also, listen to what they have to say and accordingly guide them politely.
Nowadays, teens don’t love to get poked on everything they do. So, monitoring is never a problem, just monitoring smartly is what parents need to learn.
Smart and safe Monitoring!